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[siaros]

A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least 5 pounds."

When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?"

The blonde nodded, "I'll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that 3rd day."

"From hunger, you mean?", asked the doctor."

"No, from all that skipping."

[CostasV]

Q: Why do blondes give such good blowjobs?
A: Because that's what they train for all their lives.

[siaros]

Q: Why did God create blondes?
A: Because sheep can't fetch a beer from the fridge.

[CostasV]

Q: What did the blond do when she missed the 66 Bus?
A: She took the 33 bus twice instead.

[siaros]

 In the city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful blonde was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket. As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step on the bus.

Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver she reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. Again she tried to make the step onto the bus only to discover she still couldn't! So, a little more embarrassed she once again reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little more and for a second time attempted the step and once again, much to her chagrin she could not raise her leg because of the tight skirt. So, with a coy little smile to the driver she again unzipped the offending skirt to give a little more slack and again was unable to make the step.

About this time the big Texan that was behind her in the line picked her up easily from the waist and placed her lightly on the step of the bus Well, she went ballistic and turned on the would-be hero screeching at him "How dare you touch my body!! I don't even know who you are!"

At this the Texan drawled "Well ma'am normally I would agree with you but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that we was friends."

[siaros]

Q: What's the difference between a pit bull and a blonde with PMS?
A: Lipstick.

[siaros]

What did the blonde say to her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?

“Is it mine?”

[siaros]

One day a brunette, a redhead and a blonde decide to go through their daughter's purses.

So, the brunette goes through her daughter's purse and finds cigarettes. She says, "Oh my god, I'm so ashamed! My Daughter smokes."

So, the redhead goes through her daughter's purse and finds an empty can of beer. She says, "Oh my god I'm so ashamed! My daughter drinks."

So, finally, it's the blondes turn and she finds a used condom. She says, "Oh my god I'm so ashamed! My daughter has a penis."

[siaros]

One night a man walked into a bar with an alligator.

He stood up on the counter and anounced "If i stick my cock and balls into this gators mouth, let the gator shut his jaws and pull them out without a scratch on 'em you'll all buy me a drink."

The crowed looked up at the man and nodded with glee.

So the man whipped out his cock and balls and stuck them in the gators mouth then shut the gators jaws.

A few moments later he hit it on the head with a beer bottel and the gators mouth flung open, he pulled his genitilia out without a scratch.

As he was collecting his first free drink he looked to the crowed and asked if anybody would like to try.

A hush blew over the crowed.

All of a sudden a hand shot up in the back." I would said the blond lady if you promis not to hit me in the head with a beer bottle.

[CostasV]

What did the dumb blonde say to the big breasted waitress after reading her name tag?


Cute! What did you name the other one?

[siaros]

After losing in a breast stroke swimming competition, the blonde complained that the other swimmers were using their arms.

[CostasV]

Q .. What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you?
A .. Pull the pin and throw it back.

[siaros]

Q: What do blondes do with their arseholes in the morning?
A: Pack their lunch and send them to work.

[Savvy?!]

What is a blonde searching for at the bottom of the ocean?








Leonardo Di Caprio

[Savvy?!]

Why is a blonde walking up and down in the shower?









The Shampoo has the words "Wash 'n Go" on it.